Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Bakit Ka Nga Ba Na-in Love Sa Maling Tao?

I was reading private messages on my Facebook page the other day and there’s this guy who asked me:

Bakit lagi ako napupunta sa maling tao at maling pag-ibig?

My reaction: Ay… ang bigat. :p

Hindi ko alam kung paano sasagutin so it took me a few days kasi kailangan pag-isipan. I promised him that I will write something about it so… here it is.

Wow. I wish I knew the answer. Really. Kasi kung alam ko yung sagot, ang saya saya nun. We could all dodge the Brokenheart Avenue and cut the trip short to Forever Lane. But the thing is, minsan kailangan mo maranasan kung ano ang mali para malaman mo at mas maappreciate kung ano yung tama. Lucky are those people who find their true love early but I’m pretty sure hindi rin yun perfect. In their journey to finding “forever” in each other, sigurado yun na ang dami din nilang pinagdaanan. But most of us, we had to go through a series of failed relationships and love the wrong people before we finally meet the “right one”.

I assume may pinagdadaanan ka kaya mo naitanong yan sakin and I really wish I can say something to make you feel better but I guess that’s one thing na nagpapaganda ng buhay. Yung magkaron tayo ng mga experiences na kailangan i-endure so we could grow as a person and make us better.

I don’t know if this applies to other people but I will take my experience for an example. Tao lang ako, disclaimer ha. Lahat naman tayo pag nasaktan or nadisappoint, we tend to see things negatively so aaminin ko na initially, lalo na pag fresh pa yung heartbreak, feeling mo mali yung nangyari. Mali yung tao. Mali yung naramdaman mo. Mali lahat. Pero ngayon kasi when I think about all my failed relationships, walang bitterness. Hindi mo mababago yung nangyari. May mga part na mapapailing ka nalang kasi maaalala mo na nasaktan ka pala but those experiences, yun yung dahilan why I am the way I am now and I love myself now more than ever. I love all my scars because they remind me so much of how genuinely my heart can love and how far I have gone to heal. So if you are going through something painful now, embrace the feeling because it won’t last, I promise. It may take you a long time but believe me, you will love yourself more after that.

Some people who go through heartbreaking moments tend to blame everything on “love” so uunahan ko na kayo. Love does not suck. What people do with it does. May iba na tumatanggap lang, hindi nagbibigay. May iba naman na nagbibigay lang pero hindi naman pala handang tumanggap. Some people don’t know what to do with it so they ignore how they feel. May iba na inaalagaan. They make it grow. They share it. Bawat tao, bawat klase ng pagmamahal, iba iba. But I never doubted, not even for a second, that it’s real. That “true love” or “forever” or whatever people want to call it, yes my dear friend, it exists. I haven’t dated in a long time but I fall in love every single day. I find reasons to believe in it. I see it with my dog when he licks my face in the morning. I see it with my brother and his girlfriend when they laugh at each other’s corny jokes. I see it with my parents who hold hands when they watch TV. I see it with lolos and lolas who walk beside each other in malls. I felt it with my exes who I loved immensely and who I believe at some point loved me back sincerely. I see it in mothers who look at their child as if they are the most beautiful thing in the world. I see it with my friends who bug me every now and then because they miss me. And best of all, I feel it whenever I put my hands together in prayer. You see it everywhere. It may have failed you at one point in your life but that doesn’t mean na hindi yun totoo. True love exists so don’t let pain make you believe otherwise. Sometimes I wish I could let others see life and love the way I see it because despite all the awful things around us, it is so damn beautiful.

Pag nagmahal ka, magmahal ka lang. Pag binalik sayo, pag sinuklian ka ng tama, be grateful and take good care of it. Kung hindi naman, tanggapin at magpatawad dahil ang puso mo, pag busilak, pag totoo, gagawa ng paraan ang langit para ibalik yan sayo. :)

Carpe diem!

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Monday, February 1, 2016

A Letter to My Readers

This letter is actually long overdue. I was supposed to write this as a part of my New Year ritual but I got a bit preoccupied with so many things the past few weeks. Still writing and posting it now because I really want my message to come across kaya medyo bear with the drama parts nalang :p

First of all, I would like to say THANK YOU to everyone na naging bahagi ng writing journey ko. It has been awesome since Project Ex at talagang nakakamiss kayong kakulitan. Thank you for being my source of strength and motivation. Marami sa inyo laging sinasabi that I have inspired you in some way pero gusto kong malaman niyo na kayo din ang inspirasyon ko why I do the things that I do. Thank you for giving me so many reasons to keep this fire in my heart burning. I can’t thank you guys enough for the love and support.

To all the admins of Abciddinians (Dezza and Jenny), Team ABCD (Thet, Mommy Faith, Levi and Vi-anne), WeLoveAbciddy and sa mga OP’s ng mga social media accounts ng mga characters sa mga kwento ko, you guys amaze me. Really. The dedication and the time that you are giving just to show your support to me, ibang klase kayo. Sa lahat ng bumili ng libro ko, sa mga nagbasa at patuloy na nag-iiwan ng feedback sa mga pinopost ko sa Wattpad, sa lahat ng nagbibigay ng suggestions at requests, sa lahat ng love messages and tweets that you guys send me, sa appreciation, sa mga ngiti at hello at mga personal letters na natanggap ko sa mga booksigning events… MARAMING MARAMING SALAMAT. You guys have no idea how grateful I am to God for giving me each one of you. I hope you guys know that I cherish this small family of ours and I will continue to share stories hanggat humihinga ako.

Sa mga nagtatanong what’s going to happen next with Abciddy, naku. Mahirap magupdate ng mga ganap ko sa ngayon because I’m working on so many things. If you have been reading my blogs and social media posts, I’m sure you guys know my ultimate dream and I have been working on it for years but I made a conscious decision that I’ll do it full blast this 2016. I have dropped a few activities so I could focus on writing so expect several updates here and there starting this month of February.

Kung ako ang tatanungin, I am already living the dream. Hindi pa man dumadating yung major break na hinihintay at pinagdadasal ko but having published a physical book (Thank you so much PSICOM) and 5 stories in Wattpad, plus having awesome readers like you guys who I consider my friends too, this is way more than I have imagined. Sa mga masusulat ko pa in the future both books or movies (hopefully, Godwilling), sa passion na meron ako ngayon, all of it I offer first to the Lord and of course, sa inyong lahat who have walked with me on this wonderful journey.

About the get-together, yes. Magkakaron po this year. It was hard to plan it in 2015 but whatever happens, we will make it happen this year kasi excited na ko talaga na makabonding kayong lahat. Hopefully, this year din, if time and budget will permit, I really want to push yung free writing workshop as a form of giving back na rin to the writing community. I’m also thinking of one charity event din that will involve volunteer work from my readers who would like to take part. Help me pray na maachieve natin lahat yan this year.

To end this open letter, I would like to encourage you guys to make the most out of 2016 because this year will only come once. Hindi na maibabalik. There’s always something special in turning a new leaf so take this as an opportunity to start fresh.

Sa mga students, study hard. I know cliché na pakinggan pero totoo, pag labas niyo sa real world mamimiss niyo ng sobra ang pagiging estudyante because the battle field when you leave school is a lot tougher and you will need to carry as much good memories as you can to keep you going. Work on your future now. Get good grades, do well in school, enjoy the company of your friends, and ito, totoo ‘to, get to know your teachers and professors because you will benefit from their guidance and wisdom.

Sa mga nagtatrabaho na, kahit na ano pa ang edad niyo, pursue whatever it is that God wants for you. Share your blessings and always value kindness and generosity because trust me, it will go a long way. Kung may pinagdadaanan ka, sa trabaho man yan o lovelife o kung ano pa mang aspeto ng buhay, isa lang ang weapon mo to survive – PRAYER. Never forget that.

Sa lahat ng mga nangangarap, God knows your heart. Gaya ng sinabi ko sa isa kong tweet… BELIEVE IN WHAT YOU PRAY FOR. Whatever dreams you have, work for it. Sabi nga nila “The more seeds you plant, the more chances to harvest.” Walang sukuan kahit mahirap… dapa, tayo, lakad… tuloy lang.

Tonight and always, I will pray for your heart and your dreams. God bless you guys! :)

Carpe diem!

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Twitter: @abciddy
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