Photo from: Connor Taylor Photography
Just a short entry before I go to bed. I spoke to a good
friend early today. Our funny conversation went like this:
F: Uy! Nakausap ko pala si *bleep*
Me: Ah really? Kumusta daw siya?
F: Engaged na.
*awkward silence*
Though things did not end the way I hoped for years back
when I thought we were leading somewhere (for someone I dated in the past,
there were really serious feelings involved during that time), totoo, walang halong
kaechusan, gusto ko talaga maging masaya siya. Pero ngayon ko lang narealize,
masakit din pala… konti. Haha!
Well, it wasn’t the sana-kami-nalang-ulit kind of masakit
but more like it-could-have-been-us-but-we-both-know-we’re-better-off-this-way.
It played thousands of times in my head before, yung tipong meron kang ex na
ikakasal, iba pala yung iniimagine mo lang sa totoong nangyayari na. Ngayon ko
lang na-gets yung pakiramdam na kahit alam mong ayaw mo naman kayong
magkabalikan pero mas naging totoo yung “period”, as in never na magkakaroon ng
katuloy EVER.
Anyway, at the end of the day mas nangibabaw pa din siyempre
yung masaya ako para sa kanya. Finding the right one and finally being able to
say that you are with the person you want to grow old with is one amazing blessing
na hindi lahat nakakaranas. I may have not found mine yet pero sure ako na cloud
nine ang pakiramdam nun and for someone who used to be so special to me and I used
to deeply care about, there is nothing but joy na malaman na on to the next
chapter na siya ng buhay niya.
One friend told me before “when you love a person, lumipas
man yan, hindi man maganda maging ending niyo, nandyan pa rin yan. Matatabunan
lang ng mga susunod mong mamahalin pero never mawawala.” I guess tama siya. Whether ikakasal man yan o may bago ng jowa,
may mafifeel at mafifeel ka pa rin. Kirot, hapdi, sakit, basta may mararamdaman
ka. But don’t mistake that na baka mahal mo pa o na baka gusto mo pa magkabalikan
kayo. Be happy kasi it only means nagmahal ka ng totoo. ;)
PS. Pag nakabasa kayo ng kwento ko na tungkol sa past love
na ikakasal, ayan, may idea na kayo kung saan inspired :p
Carpe diem!
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Nice ;)
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